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photos by Ban Avenue Photography
This post is going to be a bit random because quite honestly, my mind is all over the place right now. I told my Mom on the phone last night that I feel like if my brain were Safari there would be 87 tabs open right now and I'm not really accomplishing much with any of them. It's like I'm surfing Amazon on one, watching pointless YouTube videos on another, staring at a blank Word document on the next, etc. I guess that's what happens when you're 37 weeks + 1 day pregnant? Your body has pretty much gone so your mind decides to give in and go with it? Awesome.
I told y'all the other day that Zach and I sat down over the weekend to make a list of things we need to get done before the baby arrives. Things like "install car seat" (which is still in a giant box by the front door where I coaxed the FedEx guy to leave it 2 weeks ago), "get house deep cleaned" (Zach said he would pay $10,000 for this if it alleviated some of my nesting), and "write shower thank you notes" (a 2 hour job I managed to stretch out over 3 days). The list had a total of 18 things and so far we've marked off 3, so that's something. I had my 37 week check-up this morning and the doctor said it could be any day now as things are progressing as they should be, but it could also be the full 3 weeks. She said to be ready, which we aren't, so that's kind of scary. When I say we're not ready, I mean things like I listed above. Are we ready to hold our baby boy? Oh, absolutely so. We are thrilled!
I'm trying to be easy on myself and let things go- for example, I have "clean out upstairs closets" on our To Do list before baby arrives. Do those closets need cleaning out? You bet. Call that Hoarders show and get them up in here stat. But will it be the end of the world if Baby comes and we have junk-filled closets? Pretty sure we'll make it just fine. I am accepting the fact, with some hesitation, that I waited a little bit too long to get things done and at this point, I just need to rest. Yesterday I worked on several big projects and barely slept because I had inconsistent contractions all through the night, so I know I overdid it. There are things I need to get done today but if I'm honest with myself, I'm exhausted and don't feel that great, so I think a nap is in my future instead (Bear & Dasher willing). I'm realizing that it's more important to rest and take care of Baby than to get everything "perfect" for his arrival. Because at the end of the day, nothing's ever going to be entirely perfect. There will always be a messy closet or an unfinished To Do List. That's part of life. And so are precious little babies, that come whether we think we're ready or not.
Mamas, have any of you struggled with these same feelings prior to giving birth? Was nesting in full force for you, too? I'd love to hear in the comments!
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